My phone is on 18% and the charger isn’t far away, however I still don’t feel like putting forth the effort to plug my phone up.

I just recently watch a movie called Lion and it confirmed the Alice and Wonderland quote, all that wander are not lost.

When you have a very specific vision, it’s not easy to accept just anything. When you know you’re meant for something greater, it’s hard to sit still.

The problem comes when you don’t know what direction to take.

In one hand you have a vision for yourself. Filled with hard work and satisfaction.

In the other hand, is a fist full of uncertainty and doubt.

They weigh the same.

Not one hand feels heavier than the other.

This of course makes it even more difficult to let one go.

So what do you do?

Work hard to make your vision come true? Or work hard to distinguish a vision?

That’s where I am currently. I am trying to filter out the true visions and life satisfaction goals for myself.

How do you do that? — I’m not sure, but I started by asking myself “who am I?”

I am Ashley.

I am impatient and impulsive.

Sensitive and Emotionless.

Friendly and mean.

Distance and Social.

Creative and boring.

Talkative and quite.

Adventurous and timid.

Overzealous and lazy.

Anxious.

Frantic.

And calm.

I am a writer who can’t spell.

An artist who can’t draw from internal inspiration.

A painter who can’t blend.

And a childcare worker who’s afraid to have children.

In all these things I have to determine what I want, not just out of life, but what I want out of me.

Whatever it is you think you’re holding yourself back from is probably what you should be working on.

Quit being scary. Finish it.

— A