Hi there. Welcome to dear ashley nicole, formally known as 5thEmissary.com.

I’ve spent a good portion of my life not knowing what I wanted. Because of this uncertainty, I would do things and agree to things, without fully accepting if I truly wanted it or not. I made a lot of decisions in my life based on what others may have wanted, or what I thought my life should be perceived as.

Over the past year, I have had no choice but to sit with myself and all my decisions. Because this was a scary place for me, I needed help. So for the first time in my life, I honestly and truly allowed people, who I consider God’s placement, into my life and world. It was terrifying. Expressing myself normally only got me in trouble or alone. I have spent my entire life being so afraid that people would leave me, that I would only allow myself to get so close. Then it would seem as if I disappeared. But people knew I was around. And my desire was for them to also know they could reach out to me, even though my vagueness and distance probably convinced them otherwise, which I can’t blame them for.

As we travel through life, we pick up labels, even though we try very hard not to. Even though labeling is often seen as negative, it can sometimes be positive.

It is important to understand, that “labels” describe, not define.

Up until this point, I have been many things. A daughter, a sister, a friend, a best friend, a girlfriend, a little boy, a risk taker, a trouble maker, a plan canceler, a foodie, a bitch, and ex-girlfriend, a queen, and more recently, an ex-wife. There are many more things I’ve either heard or fell into the habit of calling myself. Some good, some not so good. At the end of everything, one thing I always defaulted to, was Ashley. I am Ashley.

I will be 29 this weird year of 2020. It is the last year of my twenties. To say I’ve learned a lot is an understatement, because I know there is much more for me to learn. As I reflect on everything that lead me to where I am, and as I enter my 30s, I couldn’t imagine doing it as anyone other than, Ashley Nicole Mozingo.

To newcomers to my site, welcome. Thank you so much for being here. Despite your feelings towards me, you clicked, and I appreciate that.

To those who have visited 5thEmissary frequently, I thank you all so much. The support has allowed me to grow in ways I could have never imagined.

Love.